Embracing the World around you
One thing life has taught me is how easy it is to become consumed in the world around you. To become lost in a sea of chores, to dive head first into your work or studies, to become consumed with exercise or personal hobbies. It has also taught me that you can easily fall into such traps, and yes, social media is one of those traps. I am guilty of submerging myself into all of the above.
But somehow, something has changed.
I can't exactly pinpoint where or when this change came about, but I feel as if my eyes have been opened to the world around me. My world is filled with amazing children who thirst for my time. Why would I waste such precious time on social media, fussing over the details of my home or stressing about our daily activities? I understand I can't exactly let my house go or ignore our actives, but I can prioritize and learn to let messes stay until I have extra time to attend to them. Children are quick to pick up on our stress and anxiety, and that is something I don't want mine to sense in me.
These days I want to consume my family and the joys that I find in life and I no longer worry what others will think. Because yes, when you open yourself up online you do worry what others will think or say. I've always tried not to care, but it's almost as if it is in our nature. When you completely open up and expose yourself you do care. My eyes have been opened and well, frankly, I am just too old to worry or care what others think. What I need to worry about is whether we practiced our flashcards, if I checked Jonas' homework, are the soccer uniforms clean and ready to go, did we save money this month (because we have college, x three), are the lunches packed, did my children fall asleep with a smile, did Jon and I set time aside for ourselves and have I chatted and caught up with dear friends.
If you happen to follow me on Instagram, then you probably know that my account was recently deleted somehow. Yes, I was angry and frustrated over loosing all those photos, but honestly, I think it was a blessing in disguise. I like change and new beginnings. While I was really (really) upset, I eventually realized that I just didn't care. It's only social media. I have plenty of photographs that can replace the lost ones and as for the followers, well I don't care about that either. Social media has taught me that people are very petty, they usually have an agenda and they are not genuine. Harsh words? Yes, but there is certainly some truth there. By starting a new Instagram account I have met some amazing men and women who seem genuine with no strings attached.
Change and new beginnings are good for the soul.
A clean slate is kind to the mind.
I am embracing the world around me.
One day at at time.
Where is all this stemming from?
One day I looked at Jonas and realized that he is eight. EIGHTS YEARS OLD. Almost nine. How is it possible that he is so grown up? Does time truly go that fast? Well, yes it does. This may sound selfish, but I don't have time to waste. If something brings me down or emits a negative sense, then I will release it. If I have too many items on my agenda, then I will say no to new tasks or commitments. If I find that I am becoming overwhelmed, then I will take deep breathes and a few steps backwards.
I parent first.
I embrace my marriage first.
I focus on our stability, the restaurant. Our home. School.
I seek joy and happiness in our world.
And this is my time.